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Because the Internet is not 100% secure, your abuser may be able to monitor your online activities, which could put you at risk. Please use a safer computer (i.e. at your local library, school, or a friends). If you are in immediate danger, please call 911 or the Mid-Minnesota Women's Center at (voice or TTY) 218-828-1216 or 888-777-1248 (toll-free in Minnesota).
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WOMEN'S
Q & A |
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The Women's Center is a safe refuge for women and their
children. Last year we provided shelter to 113 women and 154 children
who were fleeing from domestic violence. We also provided assistance to
625 battered women and 176 children who did not stay in the shelter.
Are you or someone you know experiencing domestic violence? We've
compiled a list of questions we are commonly asked about battering and
how to get help. In the answers, you will learn where to go in times of
crisis, how to find support, and discover options you may never have
dreamed of. Best of all, you'll realize you're not alone. We're here to
assist you in any way we can. |
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Do women have to pay to stay at
the shelter?
No. We never charge women for any of our services.
Can I bring my children?
Yes, of course. We have a playroom for younger children and Foster
Grandmothers to give them special attention. Older children go to
school.
Do you provide transportation? Will you pick me
up at my house?
We do not go to women's homes. Women come to the shelter by taxi or
Dial-A-Ride (city bus) or are brought by friends, other agencies,
pastors, Sheriff/Police Department, etc. If you can't figure out how to
get to the shelter, call us, and we'll help you to arrange
transportation.
Who does the cooking/cleaning/child care?
The women staying here sign up for daily chores such as cooking and
cleaning. Our Foster Grandmas can provide some childcare, but women also
often babysit for each other.
Has anyone ever tried to break in?
There has never been a successful break-in. Batterers do, occasionally,
come to the shelter. Advocates warn the abusers that they are
trespassing; if they don't leave, staff will call the police department.
What kind of security measures does the shelter
have?
We have a high tech security system with an alarm and double door entry
system. And we have a good working relationship with our local police
department, whose officers respond within minutes to our calls for
assistance
What is the average length of stay?
The average length of stay is about 2 weeks. This takes into
consideration women who stay overnight and those who stay for a month or
more.
Do you only take women from Crow Wing County?
No. Although we are located in Crow Wing County, we do not have
residency requirements. So we will serve women from anywhere who are
fleeing violence.
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I think I know someone who is being
abused. How can I help? |
- Listen to what she tells you.
- Believe her.
- Help her to see and build on her strengths.
- Validate her feelings.
- Avoid victim-blaming.
- Take her fears seriously.
- Offer help, but don't promise what you can't give.
- Be an active, creative partner in a woman's safety
planning effort.
- Support her decisions.
- Suggest she call a battered women's shelter or
program for additional information and support.
- Tell her that she deserves a life free from
violence.
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What can I do if I'm experiencing
domestic violence? |
- Prepare what to say if a partner becomes violent.
- Choose a safe place to go if an argument occurs.
Avoid rooms with no exits or rooms with weapons.
- Prepare and memorize a list of safe phone numbers.
Have a code word so family and friends know when assistance is needed.
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How do I know for sure if I'm a victim
of domestic violence? Ask yourself the following questions: |
- Are you embarrassed or ridiculed by your partner in
public?
- Does your partner use intimidation or threats to
get you to go along with something?
- Is your partner physical with you, pushing, shoving
or hitting?
- Does your partner attempt to control or restrict
your activities?
- Does your partner blame you for the way he/she
feels or acts?
If you've answered yes to two or more of these questions, chances
are you are a battered woman. This is particularly true if your
partner behaves in these ways on an ongoing basis.
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I want my children to see their father, but he's abusive. Where can I
find a place for my kids to see their father where all of us will be
safe?
The Alex & Brandon Child
Safety Center is designed for children and their
separated or divorced parents who have been involved in an abusive
relationship and/or conflict over visitation. Parents who are allowed
contact with their children in foster care can arrange to visit them
at the Center, too. The Center provides a positive and nurturing place
where children and their parents can be assured of a safe visit. |
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IMPORTANT STATISTICS OF DOMESTIC
VIOLENCE: |
- The crime of battering occurs every 15 second.
- More than one in three Americans have witnessed an
incident of domestic violence.
- Over 50% of all women will experience violence at
least once in an intimate relationship; half of those will experience
ongoing violence.
- Up to 50% of all homeless women and children in the
United States are fleeing domestic violence.
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Does your partner:
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Embarrass you with bad
names and put-downs?
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Look at you or act in
ways that scare you?
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Control what you do,
who you see or talk to, or where you go?
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Stop you from seeing or
talking to friends or family?
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Take your money or
Social Security, make you ask for money, or refuse to give you money?
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Make all the decisions?
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Tell you you’re a bad
parent or threaten to take away or hurt your children?
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Act like the abuse is
no big deal, it’s your fault, or even deny doing it?
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Destroy your property
or threaten to kill your pets?
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Intimidate you with
guns, knives, or other weapons?
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Shove you, slap you or
hit you?
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Force you to drop
charges?
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Threaten to commit
suicide
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Threaten to kill you?
If
you checked even one, you may be in an abusive relationship.
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For more information or to speak with an advocate, please
contact us anytime at the following:
Women's Center of Mid-Minnesota
P.O. Box 602
Brainerd MN 56401
Email: mmwomctr@brainerd.net
Call (voice or TTY) us at 218-828-1216 or toll-free at 888-777-1248 |
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